False Adult Archetype
The voice of the false adult archetype can sound like “All work, no play”. Things have to be unnecessarily hard, play and joy are basically not allowed. And if we‘re being playful, not serious enough or experience ease, the false adult might jump in and tell us that this is not how it should be and that we’re doing it wrong. This approach to doing things may take the life out of them.
A good marker that we have been unconscious as the false adult can be, that something that usually brings us joy is turned into labour. That might be a hobby, our vocation or the way we’re relating to another person. The false adult values “getting something done” more than how something feels, how we feel or how another person feels. “The goal is more important than the process.” “The work needs to be done”, is the excuse to be disembodied. We might believe the thoughts of the false adult, which may be “How can I possibly have my life together like that?”, “I need to do these things before I can rest or do any self care” or something like “If I don’t do this now, it will be a mistake and something bad will happen”. The false adult may trick us into thinking that her thoughts are how we can be responsible for our life and move forward. Actually she is faking maturity and her way of “keep working, no matter what” is not real responsibility.
There’s nothing wrong with this part. That is just all it knows. It works very hard in order to fix everything. To engage with our life in a different way, we don’t have to blame this part, exclude it or get angry at it, for being as it is. We can get on a team with this part, by showing up for it and finding out what it wants. As we start loving and including this part of us, we gain the ability to be conscious of the dynamics, when and how it starts running the show. By showing up consistently we develop real responsibility and get to make our own choices.
Art Geoffrey Gersten